www.freakyplasticsurgery.com - what's wrong with me?

what's wrong with me?

okay. so. I really really need your advice. I really, really hate myself. there have been a lot of times where I just think.. what's the point? it used to just have to do with my looks, but it's so much worse than its ever been. its my personality too.. but mostly my looks. I went to get a state ID the other day, and I had to take a picture. the guy that took it told me it was one of the best he's taken, and I literally left the place crying because I can't take it anymore. some days I feel confident, but on the days that I hate myself it's to the point where I don't even want to.. I don't know. my therapist moved out of the freaking state. should I get a new one? it doesn't matter to me what anyone says. im sick of looking like this. im sick of feeling like I need surgery to make me look decent. I have a list of plastic surgeries that I need when I'm older, and im only 14. I can't look at myself in bright lights, I only look at pictures that I take of myself, I can't look in the mirror without being at least 10-15 feet away, and the lighting has to be perfect. I left the mall crying the other day. I really don't know what to do anymore. I literally have a fear or mirrors and my own reflection. I don't know what's wrong with me. should I see somebody? this is me: http://s280.photobucket.com/albums/kk183/singer2beeee/?action=view&current=Photoon2010-05-29at17163-1.jpg http://s280.photobucket.com/albums/kk183/singer2beeee/?action=view&current=Photoon2010-04-23at14233-1.jpg I struggled with three years of anorexia. They make me eat a lot now and I'm sick of looking like this, so I'm trying to lose 50 pounds. I can't leave my house without makeup. nobody understands. everybody thinks that I think im pretty, but I really really am serious when I say that I think I have a problem. I know everybody has insecure moments, but normal people don't cry when they look in mirrors, or sob when they see a bad picture of themselves.. right?

Public Comments

Damn girl how do u think ur ugly u hella cute maybe the guy said that cause his into u or something ur so pretty!!!=)
right, that's not normal. you are soo gorgeous, but obviously me saying that isn't gonna change anything, you need to love yourself. can you talk to your parents? definitely try to find a new therapist, i wish i could say something else...i really just can't help you. but you're beautiful. :)
sweetie, your buetiful. but, if you really cant handle it... put somthing on your mirror. carry around a germ x bottle so you dont have to look in the mirror in the bathrooms in public places. i think its a great idea to see sombody about it. when people hold up a camara get out of the picture. or try to. and if you see a picture that makes you cry cut yourself out of it. Does your mom or dad know about this? or your guardian? and if you are still tring to loose weight then keep track of what you eat. buy clothes that make you feel pretty and buetiful. does this information help?
Darlin, you're gorgeous. Hell, you're prettier than 99% of people in the world, and you seriously shouldn't even be thinking about losing weight. Now that's ridiculous. You're a gorgeous young woman, and you should be alive and living life to it's fullest. I hope you listen to me when I say forget your insecurities, and start loving yourself and your looks, cause hell, there's a lot to love. :) I hope I helped, and best of luck. :) If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always take to me also. Although that may be awkward for you at first since we don't know each other, I just want to extend my friendship. :)
You are gorgeous, don't let anyone convince you that you are not! If you need a new therapist to stabalize your life then go for it! Everyone has insecure days or weeks. Just try to build up some confidence because you are beautiful!
Sorry~ but you're a totally in need of help. You're gorgeous! Is that all you wanted to hear? You want some cold hard and bitter truth to bite you in the butt? Check this out then: (warning graphic) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bq9l2r3Ax9k you're a lucky biotch and there's no denying it. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. STOP WHINING.
Honestly, and I am not lying, you are really pretty, don't loose weight, you look like you are a good size. I feel the same way, I have a large nose, small eyes, and purple lines under my eyes, I don't leave the house without make-up on too, and so do most people. You are pretty, if you are feeling this way, see someone, talk to them. Don't try to loose 50 pounds, you look great in the photo and from what I see, you don't need to lose any weight at all. You don't want to look like someone who hasn't eaten in years, it ends up looking skinny, you could get sick. You have pretty eyes and you make up looks gorgeous on you. You 14 and when I first saw the picture I saw someone much older, you look my age which is 18. Don't turn into the cat lady who had tones of plastic surgery done, it is not healthy. I plan on getting a nose job but that is where I stop. Its not bad to want to be pretty, but you are pretty, and very pretty at that. So see someone if you feel like you need to lose 50 pounds because I don't think you do. anorexia is a serious disorder.
I'd really like to talk to you about this stuff because I am going through some of the same things and I think I could help more than the normal "you're beautiful". If not, I understand. (: As a 15 year old, I struggle even now with my weight. I have a very toned stomach and I know it, but I feel unhealthy and disgusting sometimes. What helped me feel more secure with myself was to look in the mirror for a really long time. Not in a vain way, just so that you got past the initial thing people do where they examine the bad first. The longer you look, the more good you'll see too. Make a list of all those good qualities. Frame it, put it where you can see it whenever you feel insecure. Take that list of plastic surgeries you want and rip it up. Toss it out. Just stare in the mirror and accept that you are prettier than you think. You're a gorgeous girl, honestly. Don't stress about it. There are so many people born with birth defects and disfigured. We're really lucky for being naturally attractive and we should embrace that, rather than scrutinizing it.
Sweetie I'm no expert, but if you do feel the way you say you do, it's more then just an insecure moment. Yes you should see someone,. You should find a new therapist because you cannot go on like that, you need to talk to someone who knows what you're going through, someone that can help you overcome it. People don't believe you when you say you're not pretty because you are very pretty, and I think only a specialist can help you and understand you. Look for help, it's the best thing to do.
Listen to all these other answers!! :)
Yes, you are correct, most people don't cry when they look in mirrors or sob when they see pictures of themselves. I looked at your picture and think you are very pretty but, I can tell by your question that you won't believe me, anyway. Yes, I think you should get a new therapist. One that specializes in Body Dysmorphic Disorder. It sounds to me like you you don't even see yourself the way that others see you. If you are only 14 and feel this way about yourself, imagine what you will do to yourself when you begin to get wrinkles! Definately see someone. But, I also suggest seeing someone who's first "treatment" is not a bunch of pills. Someone who will help you see yourself as you really are. Someone who will help you accept any flaw you may have, even if you hate them.
woahh your beautiful lol if i knew you i would probably ask you out :) lol though then you'd probably say no to mee but oh well :P
ok so this is embarrassing, i kinda do the same stuff alot. im 14. my mother is a psychiatrist and she says that even tho you feel like your alone and your the only one doing the things your doing your not i hate photos of me and my body and all that however losing 50 is a ridiculous goal and you dont need any plastic surgery at least not at 14 because your a beautiful girl i dont know about who ever you were talking to but whoever you were talking to might do phone sessions my mom does and if they dont but you feel like you need a new one, get one. feeling bad about your self is ok as long as you also feel good sometime and if you dont you probably need to work on your self image not anything about your physical characteristic i know how you feel tho i definitely do good luck :)
Nothing is wrong with you! i personally think your gorgeous. its all in your head, you should get a therapist, try to go out without make up, try standing close to the mirror with no fears! bad pictures happens to everybody, i hate almost every picture i take, i even think im ugly sometimes but its all about confidence, and you have to be more confident, you don't need to lose 50 pounds or put make up on to look pretty. i think people look better without make up because, well its natural beauty. you should try to get a new therapist and stop thinking negative about yourself.
I honestly have no idea how you could think of yourself as anything less than beautiful. You look gorgeous in those two pictures and I'm not lying. You can look at my other answers in the past..I tell people the truth whether it hurts or not. I understand that it's not always easy to love yourself though, and when I was your age I had a really bad self esteem problem too and probably had similar eating habits to you too. I know it's easy to pick out "imperfections" but you've got to realize that everybody has things they'd change about themselves if they could and even then they still probably wouldn't be completely satisfied. I wasn't happy with myself, so I changed myself until I was happier but I soon realized I'd never be "perfect" and that's okay because nobody can be. Pick out something about yourself that you do like even if it's just a little something, and remind yourself everyday how great that part is of you. I know it's hard, I promise I've been there before. Maybe you should look into seeing a different therapist if you think there's a chance it could help. Feel free to message me anytime :)
I understand this completely! And I do believe you. I felt that way for a very long time, and nobody understood. I saw a therapist, but it didn't help me much. Really for me learning to love myself came with time. I was in a terribley severe state of depression for many years, I was bullied and torrmented in school, to the point where I had to finally leave in the 9th grade. I was also having problems at home, and I ended up feeling very bad about myself. I tried many things to help myself get better, but nothing worked. For me I just got up one day and told myself I was sick of it, and I realized that I was a beautiful girl and I did deserve to feel better. Stuff has just been slapping me in the face the last year, and I've realized what a waste of precious life being so depressed and feeling so bad about yourself is. It's one baby step at a time, so don't be worried if you don't start feeling better right away, it takes progress. I wish you the best!
I would definitely suggest finding a therapist again because if it was helpful before, then you should try to continue with it. Next I would like to say that you don't need surgery. The way you see yourself in a mirror is not how others see you. And you should not let your looks, good or bad, determine your character. I have my off days when I really wish nobody could see me. On these days I catch myself not being myself because I'm self-conscious. I withdraw and try not to be noticed by anyone. But the solution to this temporary dilemma would not be to hate myself. Instead, I tell myself that it's ok not to be perfect once in a while. Give yourself a break. Respect your body for the glorious creation that it is. You're beautiful. =)
everybody hates things about themselves even famous people it doesn't matter who it is we all have insecurities.if other people think your pretty you should be confident that u r.u don't need surgery.basically what i am trying 2 say is that u r pretty and normal you just need 2 try 2 b a little more confident. oh and if someone says you aint pretty forget it its just their opinion its the inside that counts and if you start 2 see ur self as pretty a lot more people will
you are pretty